Choices..The Final Chapter

Lilly decided she must be in labor. Nobody had told her what to expect. Nobody told her that contractions would be so painful. She had hidden the pregnancy so long, that she was completely uneducated about giving birth. All she knew was what she had heard over the years and wasn't even sure what to believe.

Lilly had contractions for hours. She quietly cried in pain. She didn't want to wake her parents. It finally got so bad that she knew she needed to go to the hospital. About two in the morning, she woke her brother and told him she needed her mother. Her mother knew immediately that she was in active labor.

Lilly's mother had easy and quick deliveries. Her last baby came after she felt a couple of contractions. Lilly's grandmother was visiting at the time and knew enough to put a vinyl tablecloth down on the front seat of Lilly's parent's car. The hospital was only three blocks away. Lilly's brother was born inside the car, in the parking lot of the hospital.

Lilly's brother woke their father and he was in the car waiting when Lilly and her mother made it to the driveway. Her father was a nervous wreck. He knew what happened last time, with his wife, and hoped Lilly's baby could wait until they got to the hospital. Lilly cried in pain all the way to the hospital. It took them twenty minutes to get there.

Lilly's father got a nurse who came out with a wheelchair. Lilly's parents told her that they loved her and that everything would be fine. She would be fine. It was all happening so fast. Her parents had only found out three days earlier that Lilly was pregnant. It was not fast for Lilly though, it had been an eternity since she got pregnant.

Lilly was taken to a delivery room. One of the nurses asked who her OB was. Lilly didn't know what an OB was. Then they asked her which doctor she had been seeing during her pregnancy. Lilly told them she hadn't seen one. She could see the expressions on the nurses' faces had changed. No longer did they look kind and caring. It was more outraged and angry. Lilly was even more frightened.

Lilly's pain grew worse and she asked if they could give her something for the pain. The nurse told her no, that she had no prenatal care and they were worried about the baby. The contractions continued for three more hours, when finally a male doctor came in and asked, "What have we got?" A nurse told the doctor that Lilly was fifteen and had not had any prenatal care. The doctor didn't even flinch. He told Lilly that it was time to have her baby and to push when he told her to.

Lilly was in agony. No pain medication. She swore to herself that she would never have sex again. Lilly did as the doctor told her to and felt like she was being ripped apart. Finally, she heard the doctor tell her she had a boy. Lilly was out of it, but heard the nurse say, "She is giving him up for adoption." They told her that her son weighed nearly twelve pounds and was healthy. Then they took him into another room. Lilly didn't get to see him. They told her it would be best if she was giving him up. Lilly didn't know enough to tell them that she wanted to see her son. At last, she was medicated and stitched up. She was taken to a room on another floor.

Lilly asked her mother why she was in a room with a couple of old ladies. Her mother told her that it was best not to be around all the new mothers with their babies. Her brothers and one of their friends came to visit Lilly while she was in the hospital for two days. Her brothers knew the truth, but the friend, the rest of her family and her friends were told she was having her appendix out.

A woman from the hospital came with all kinds of forms for Lilly to fill out. She asked Lilly what name she wanted on her son's birth certificate. Lilly hadn't thought of that. She told the lady, " My son's name is Michael Paul." Social Services came for Lilly to sign the papers to put her son in foster care until he could be adopted. Lilly was very sad and wasn't sure she wanted to give him up. She signed the papers.

Before she left, the doctor came in to check on her and right in front of her mother, he asked, "Do you need any birth control pills?" Lilly looked at her mother and said, "No, I don't need them." Lilly would have taken them, had her mother not been there. She knew she swore not to ever have sex again, but she also realized, that at some point she would.

Once home, Lilly was getting all kinds of cards and flowers. All hoping she felt better after having her appendix out. She hated it, but didn't say a thing.

Lilly got a call from a social worker who was working on her case. The lady told her that since Lilly knew who the father was, he would have to sign the relinquishment papers as well. Lilly was livid. She told the woman his address and also told her if he would not sign, she would not be giving her son up for adoption. There was no way Lilly was letting that loser have her baby. He signed them.

When her son was about eight weeks old, Lilly and her mother were summoned to the Social Services Department. Lilly was singing the final adoption papers. On the way there Lilly asked her mother what would happen if she wanted to keep her son. Lilly's mother told her if she wanted to keep him, she could. But, her parents would raise him as their adopted son and he would become Lilly's brother. Lilly hated that idea.

Lilly finally got to see and hold her son. He was beautiful. Lilly loved him. She spent an hour alone with him while she thought about what to do. She realized that living as her brother, would never work for her. If he came home with her, he would have to be her son. Then she thought about the fact that she was only fifteen and how hard it would be to raise a child. She thought it was selfish not to give him what she thought would be a better life. She knew the people who wanted to adopt him already had one adopted son. Lilly was also told that the couple would tell their children they were adopted. Also, she knew that the couple could support him, had a loving and stable family life and would love Michael.

That was the first and last time Lilly got to hold her son. Lilly loved her son. Lilly chose adoption.

The End